I guess that I'm just plain overwhelmed by the world that I experience, albeit tangentially. Or perhaps I'm just lazy? That's the rationale I use whenever I decide to notice that I have not risen to the challenge to write about the things that I know are wrong and can be changed. I know that one small voice can make a difference, at least some of the time. So, trying to focus on the 2016 candidates, the TPP trade deal, the continuing slaughter of unarmed men by policemen across the nation have all innervated my ability to speak. Besides, there are so many others who are so much better at writing about the ills that surround us all.
And then of course, there is the reality that I have never felt that anyone would be remotely interested my mundane issues, a blog post about the things that all of us experience, that thing called living life. So, I rarely delve into my now. But, today after reading about a man named Bill who could have been probably the greatest Daily Kos bloggers, I decided to take a chance and expose a part of my life.
In mid-January I went for a routine medical exam and was instead admitted, ADMITTED - not allowed to leave - at least not until I agreed to return for an inside inside viewing of my heart and arteries. I was a bit flustered to say the least. As a very proactive patient, I demanded, all day long to be released. Once I heard that the professionals were a bit concerned that I was on the fast train to an "event", a fast approaching heart attack, I agreed to return as long as they would release me to go home. The deal was made and I went home and prepared myself mentally and emotionally to face the possibility that forty plus years of hypertension had finally taken it's toll.
The months leading up to my routine physical exam had been a roller coaster chocked full of stress. Basically I'm a mom and like tens of millions, well probably billions, of other moms, my kids are my heartbeat. Don't get me wrong, their father is the very air that I breathe, but the kids....well, you get the idea.